“I know God will not give me anything I can’t handle. I just wish He didn’t trust me so much.” ~Mother Teresa

Are you feeling exhausted? I mean, really exhausted. Like, if one more thing should fall on your shoulders you will either cry or burst into rage. And it doesn’t matter that you’re the always-happy-optimistic-you’re-gonna’-change-the-world-kinda’-person because today… today, the world is changing you.

And you say that you don’t want to help another person, or give any more of you because you ain’t got anything left. Yo ‘toy jarta coño! You are feeling crucified at the crossroad. You’ve reach the intersection of i-wish-a-mutha’-f*#@%-would and por-mi-madre-santa-que-si-me-pasa-algo-mas… You feel complete exhaustion. Spiritually, physically, emotionally, and financially, every aspect of your life is being challenged. How can you possibly keep your head up? If you dig any deeper the ground above you will bury you alive.

And so some of us pray. Others chant, meditate, reflect, sing… we find a way to speak to the Universe.

In this moment I pray for Stillness and Peace…

If the Universe brings me to it, it will get me through it.
If the Universe brings me to it, it will get me through it.
If the Universe brings me to it, it will get me through it.

It is ok to say you can’t help anyone right now. It is ok to rest. It is ok to say No. It is ok to cry, to breakdown, to breakup, to surrender to the fact that you are Human. Surrender to the concept that we do not have to be happy all the time or at everyones disposition or available to our family and friends when they need us. We can say NO. I can say NO.

This collection of “things that keep happening” is a reminder to just be still with your Self.

Take care of you right now. Not for a day or a week. Allow yourself ALL the time you need. You cannot possibly care for anyone if you are depleted. Focus your energies on YOU. Pray for YOU. Take care of YOU.

Believe that you deserve a YOU that is healthy in every aspect of your life. That may require surrendering this idea that we need to always be available to those things and those people who “need” us.

When you really look at it, you’re not turning your back on them, you’re turning towards your Self.

This is simply and necessarily Self care.

the minority project

March 4, 2013

in our neighborhoods
the avenues are packed
with fast food restaurants
that starve us slowly.
value-less meals
dipped in special sauce
deplete our bodies.
we consume chemicals
that turn our stomachs
into quarter-pounds of fat.
obesity and heart disease
the golden arches
of our health disparities.
they. are. loving. it.

in our neighborhoods
the avenues are packed
with churches
but nobody is being saved.
church leaders get rich
on the poor’s faith;
halleluiahs are a business now.
bankrupt souls.
our biggest debt
is to our spiritual selves.
let. the. church. folk. say.

in our neighborhoods
our schools are packed.
failing and falling apart,
our abc’s are tested
on a system that was fixed
to educate a different
group of students,
who have a different set
of resources.
but we get the “F”
and the reports
leave us wondering
why the kids couldn’t
carry the one…
“well you know Mis’
it’s difficult to add
when all of your
life you’ve been subtracted.”
our children
become common denominators.

in our neighborhoods
the streets are packed
with people who walk with no direction.
all the roads say one way.
this was never built to actually
make you feel at home.
we are displaced in our own communities.
nothing belongs to us. not even our thoughts.
we have street signs named after dead leaders
and road blocks have been built
in the name of infrastructure
we arrive at dead ends
with every corner we turn.
you can’t have a dream here.
there is no moving on up
when the east side
is being gentrified.
so we’re moving on down.
ghettos are for sale.
buy cheap. sell high.
if you build it
they will leave…

hungry. poor. uneducated. displaced.

this is how you keep a majority labeled minority.