i’m so angry i don’t even know what to title this piece

January 26, 2012

i need to free my captive tongue.

let it break through the bars of my teeth
and grind out the words i’ve kept inside
for fear that i would offend someone,
i always edit my words.

see when brown and black folk
start screaming
they call us crazy. uneducated. disrespectful.
class-less…

so i swallow the spit.
creating phlegm,
my chest grows tighter
and i can’t breathe.
my bronchitis turns to pneumonia.

do not judge me
for coughing it all up.
’cause ya’ mutha’ fuckas’
do some shit like hold a public office
and tell an entire community
that the way you will heal them
for YOUR mistakes
is by having a fucking taco dinner.

you insensitive, ignorant, hijo e’ puta
you coward. you privileged… white bastard.

i dont’ want your apology.
keep your excuses
y te lo metes’ por el culo.

i want you to step down,
’cause you don’t have the balls to step up
and admit your truth.

when you think that a taco dinner and a trip to puerto rico
show diversity, YOU. ARE. A. FUCKING. RACIST.

(by the way, puerto rico was glad you left)

remember malik jones?
can i get the stats on Latinos arrested
in your community?

you are nothing
short of a cabron.

so i am left
to shove my middle finger
down my throat
and throw up everything i’ve kept inside
’cause i refuse
to keep shitting it out
into the sewers that run
through our cities and underneath us
like water under the bridge…

it’s easier to ignore what you don’t see.

i can easily see what you’ve ignored.

but you are just one of so many more.
who sit in churches . who hold office.
who run corporations and banks.
who speak out your ass…

while we bite our tongues
bleeding anger
onto our chapped lips,
we look rabid because we are
so fucking tired of your bullshit.

and what frustrates me even more
is that your brethren… your kind… your people….
they don’t even call you out on your own hatred.

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4 Responses to “i’m so angry i don’t even know what to title this piece”

  1. Tracy Says:

    In this~ you are an authentic human-being. You feel, & thus, you feel for others. You employ empathy & compassion- and you cannot imagine otherwise.

    Except: there are those who walk amongst us- who do not actually “feel”, anything. What they have is a stunted childhood of misery- for whatever reason…THEY have learned the “act”. They act as they have observed others- yet, they do not actually “feel”. They are jealous- as they understand they are not quite aligned- but don’t know why- and cannot accept their flaws. In return, they punish all in their path.

    It won’t matter how long or in what way you attempt to change or to figure it- it does NOT change & will NOT alter…

    T


  2. I read this at 3am wow I felt every word and understand were you are coming from we juust have to try not let the anger eat away at us 😉


    • thanks for reading.

      anger isn’t eating away at me… keeping it in has. i believe sometimes we need to express our anger as a normal part of our life. often times, people like me, who do not turn to anger at all… end up “exploding” or “imploding” in other areas. so i choose to write out my anger. i put it out there and then i let it go.

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